Something a little bit different today.
I’ve had a theory about this for a while now, a couple of years at least, but I’ve never put pen to paper. Or fingertips to keyboard…
However, I have used this analogy when talking to a couple of close friends who were struggling to deal with their partners’ ahem, behaviour.
I was reminded about this subject last week when watching The Crown (OMG!! Have you seen it yet?? So awesome!) Anyway… there’s this conversation between The Queen and Lord Louis Mountbatten (her second cousin) and he advises:
“You married a wild spirit — we both did” (referring to his own wife)
“Trying to tame them is no use… when you really adore someone as fully and as hopelessly as I think you and I do, you put up with anything.”
I will not put up with ‘anything’ – not even from the people I love. My theory is that some people are not wild spirits, but more like wild horses. Bear with me for a minute…
If your partner/best friend/family member is a wild horse, you can’t just run wild alongside them. Two wild horses equals trouble. Whether it be an addiction or substance abuse or god knows what other things you could get yourselves into, in my opinion – it’s just not a good idea.
Equally, trying to tame them in the sense of locking them up in a stable and expecting them to behave like other horses isn’t going to work either. They will resent you, and try to bolt at any given opportunity.
So you need to learn to ride the horse. Without a saddle or stirrups. Now, I’m no horse rider, but I know that this is a challenge. One that is possible however. Through trial and error you will get there. You just need to master the balance and learn when to pull in the reins and when to let them be free…